Which one to believe??

Before any of my friends start getting worried, this is NOT a post about me.
This is just a translation of some emotions in words from someone whose voice is long due to be out. And this post is my way of paying a tribute, to all that the friend has gone through, while respecting her need for privacy. A way for letting those emotions be defined to the best of my ability so that somewhere somebody doesn't fret over the words most apt for description of such feelings - "Pata Nahin" ("I don't know!")
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I dont know whether its just a figment of my imagination or if it is actually happening.

But there is certainly something different, very different, eerie...
I somehow cant describe the way I feel. 
But I have to get it out of me, before it causes any further damage.
It's something like this -
I tremble a lot.
I am always scared. Of whom, I don't know!!!
I tend to be aloof.
I want to have no one around me.
Strangers are OK, but those I know and specially those who care for me, are a strict No.
I am afraid to be with them.
I find it difficult to breathe.
I shudder.
I don't want to be awake.
I don't want to eat, drink, move, or even live.
I first thought it is just another part of my emotional side.
Maybe I am not yet over with all that I have heard, seen, felt in past few months.
But it doesn't cease to exist.
It seems I am living in perpetual fear.
I feel as if everyone out there is mocking me.
As if, no one is on this side of the globe which I am standing upon.
As if, I am plunging deeper and deeper into nothingness.
As if, they are trying to get me.
As if, they want me to have all these thoughts.
As if, they are snatching away my desire to live.
As if, they are consciously trying to remove all traces of happiness from my life.
As if, they are making me feel that I am no good.
As if, they are succeeding.
Its scary.
I read something and I can't come out of the world the author has created.
I watch some movie and am trapped in the scene; mostly at the background, where they are waiting for me, to pounce upon, to just make me anything but myself.
I cant seem to accept the world as it is.
GOD!!! Am I hallucinating????
It feels as if everyone around me is a fake, a non entity, and soon I will be one of them.
Why?
I tell myself, this is just a passing phase.
It will be over.
I am just imagining things.
There is no one to scare me.
There is nothing to be afraid of.
But, my trembling hands, my moist eyes, my clenched fists, my shaking voice... tell me something else.
There are these feelings, and then there is the truth.
I don't know, which one is more terrifying.
I don't know, which way to go.
I don't know, whom to believe.